More Changes Abound

Ok, so it seems that 2009 will go down in Ritchie family lore as the year of change. Can I admit that I hate most of it.

Leah and Matt have talked about going to Memphis since before they were married. Matt refuses to consider any other place to live. They have gone around and around about it. Leah has struggled over it. Matt's parents arrive on Saturday. So sometime on Monday or Tuesday the kids leave for Memphis. Life will never be the same.

This week has been emotional. Matt has shown some anger issues which weren't in place before they were married. This week it has been bad and so Leah has been staying with us. I have advised her to not go to Memphis. I am very worried. But she loves him and feels that she needs to do everything possible to make things work. I respect that and even admire her for the fact that she wants things to work. Most kids would walk away and say forget it.

I have no repesct for Matt and probably won't for a very long time. He has said and done some terrible things to Leah. It makes me sad. I don't know what will happen, but they are leaving.

I know what it means for me.......I will not be going to Memphis. Mostly because I will not be able to afford it. So my daughter who is my good friend will leave and I will not know her as a young wife or mother. I will know her only as the daughter who lived in my home.

I heard back from the college today. I can get into school. I have to meet with my financial aid advisor, then work it down to take only six or seven credits each semester. I will graduate in July, two years after I was suppose to.

So tomorrow I am making the trek to the college and getting everything done that I can. I HATE that I have to jump through as these DAMN hoops. But things are so on hold for me that I guess I will jump and do whatever they say.

It has been eight months since Steffen left us. I cannot believe where time has gone. His birthday is next week. He would be 47.......So hard to believe he is gone and at an age that he really shouldn't be.

I have slept very little the last two nights. So many things going on. I have spent this day running on about three hours of sleep. Hopefully tonight is better.

Anna is doing well in school. She asked if she could be homeschooled or go back to being five again. I told her NO on both accounts. She laughed and said she wished it was that easy. But school is going well, she is enjoying it and is all ready working hard.

David applied for a new job with Walmart. It is a front end manager position of some sort. He would earn about two dollars an hour more, it would be a lot of responsibility. He has talked to several managers and they think David would be so good with the job. So either tomorrow or Monday is the interview. He is excited.

I have talked to Nathan a couple of times this week. He is depressed and frustrated with life. I don't know how to help him other than pray. Then listen. I have tried to do that this week.

I think that sums up life in our corner of Idaho. It has been hot, about 90-100 degrees. But cool evenings. I love September, not just because it is my birthday, but because it means the weather changes.

I hope life is treating you well. It has been hard here, but hopefully better days are ahead. Peace!!